Experiencing Emotions – Yes, No, Maybe?

Experiencing Emotions – Yes, No, Maybe?

I knew it the second I laid my eyes on it. The beauty of it had filled my eyes, and that second, I had known that I wanted to get married there. I didn’t know if the venue was even available or the cost of it or anything else, I just knew I wanted to tie the knot there. It was such a pleasing view. The pond water was painted with reflections of the blue sky and the extensive branches of the trees shadowing it. The stone steps leading to the pond reminded me of a temple near my grandparent’s house where I had spent many evenings listening to tales of my granddad. It was like the space spoke to me and evoked a feeling of nostalgia within me.

While my family and I soaked in the mesmerizing view, there had been a representative from the office waiting to talk to us. I remember that she gave us our space to take it all in and then greeted us. I had held my breath as she asked if we had any dates in mind so she could check the availability and I had squeaked in joy when we realized it was available for our date. Taking us around the vast expanse of the property, she had explained in detail which ceremony could be held where and what kind of décor suited the property the best. My family had liked each space more than the last, but I had my heart set on the pond.

After spending almost two hours at the venue, discussing terms and looking at pictures, I recall myself being a bride with her dream wedding in clear vision. I was never the girl with a liking for all things modern and complex. I liked reading paperback novels over watching movies, having conversations over coffee instead of texts or mails. Even with the wedding, I wanted something simple and traditional, and I had found that at The Tamarind Tree.

It was the day of my wedding; Even though the wedding was late in the morning, I had woken up at a godly to my mother’s calling and I was sitting like a statue while the make-up artist worked her magic on me. All my sensations were numb, but contrastingly enough, my stomach was filled with butterflies. I had been one of the very few in my generation who had opted for an arranged marriage and suddenly I felt like I didn’t know what I had gotten myself into. It was like an alarm sound triggered in my head and I could not find the switch to turn it off. With a galloping mind and a poker face, I mechanically followed the photographer as I had time to spare till the ceremonies began.


I heard him before I saw him. As I walked towards the wedding mantap at the pond, my fiancé stood dressed in rich creamy silk dhoti and a red shawl to match my red saree. He was standing tall and handsome in front of a beautifully decorated mantap, talking to the wedding planner. He hadn’t really involved himself much during the planning process and since he didn’t see me walk in, I stayed away listening to the conversation. He seemed to be going over some sort of checklist with her. “Make sure the musical troupe plays this list of songs, some of the bride’s family members are flying in late and we might be in the ceremony, so please make sure they are taken care of and oh, don’t forget, no jasmine flowers anywhere.” My heart skipped a beat when he said the last sentence. I didn’t think he would remember.

On our second or third meeting about 8 months ago, I had mentioned to him that the smell of jasmine triggers a headache in me and had always been one of the most uncomfortable things at weddings. And that’s it. Not many of my own family members knew about this as I didn’t want to fuss because it was inevitable to have jasmine flowers in a south Indian wedding. But the fact that he remembered, made my heart melt and toes tingle. He turned around to see me and at that moment, the butterflies in my stomach were there for a whole other reason.

They say you find love when you least expect it. On my wedding day, standing under the pavilion, 8 months after I met him and 6 months of being engaged, I found mine. It was the simplest trigger but that was all I needed. When our eyes met, I was sure. He smiled and I felt like everything around me froze. I didn’t notice the movement of people, the music and all the hustle. We got together and the photographer didn’t have to ask me to smile. I knew I would be smiling for a long time after.

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